


What Is Expected

by yankee_clytemnestra



Category: Ghostbusters (2016)
Genre: Drabble, F/F, Run-On Sentences, Science Girlfriends, light abuse of italics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-18
Updated: 2016-07-18
Packaged: 2018-07-24 17:41:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 459
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7517381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yankee_clytemnestra/pseuds/yankee_clytemnestra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jillian Holtzmann is five-feet-two-inches of haphazard disaster in knock-off Doc Martens.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What Is Expected

**Author's Note:**

> I dunno what this is, I just wanted to write about Holtz hahaha (this was supposed to be longer, sorry bout it)

Erin doesn't understand it.  
Jillian Holtzmann is five-feet-two-inches of haphazard disaster in knock-off Doc Martens.  
At first impressions, she's a speeding train-wreck about to happen, impending catastrophe in daffodil lenses. Then she somehow whips out a fantastic, brilliant creation out of her helter-skelter hurricane mind, and Erin would be lying if she said she wasn't a little dazzled by it. Well, by her. Every time, the way she can inexplicably congeal the speeding, serpentine highway of semi-automatic thoughts into gleaming, smoking, beautiful explosions and bombs and bullets.  
It doesn't make sense to Erin, really, how she can do that. She sometimes thinks the woman might be a bit magic. How can she be so chaotic, so eccentric, so absolutely genius? Despite the cluttered, mile-a-millisecond thoughts that shoot out automatic, one right after the other, like the weapons they become, -or perhaps because of them- Erin thinks Holtzmann's mind must be rather a beautiful thing. She's so different, so unlike any other scientist anywhere near that caliber Erin has ever met before.  
And she would really be lying if she said she didn't find that incredibly intriguing. By incredibly intriguing, of course, she means incredibly _attractive_. 

And she has spent far too long trying to figure out what, exactly, is racing through that baffling brain she so admires. Like any good scientist, she analyzes every minuscule fragment of data she's given. Every passing wink, every dimply grin, every touch, every eyebrow waggle and compliment and obscenely sexual joke. She picks them apart over and over again, always inconclusive. Holtzmann may be their resident engineer, but Erin destroys and rebuilds every little memory to a painful extent.

Erin doesn't understand it, but good _God_ , does she want to. 

It isn't the unknown that drives her insane; she's a scientist, she hypothesizes. It's that she can't find her results without more than likely decimating their friendship entirely. She has no way of supporting or refuting any hypothesis she may come to. She just wishes Holtzmann would at least have the decency to stop _flirting_ with her, for God's sake. She has, on occasion, entertained the thought, the juvenile wish, that Holtzmann returned her sentiment. A mind so convention-fuckingly gorgeous is not going to glance at her twice. It wouldn't be right. It wouldn't be expected. 

So naturally, she is razzle-dazzled and knocked off her feet once again by Holtzmann's incredible, odd brain when she kisses her in the lab one afternoon. It happens absolutely spontaneously. No warning, no build up. On impulse, sudden, fleeting. As she does everything else. Erin laughs, because in a way, she should have seen it coming.  
With all her painful calculation, one would think Erin would consider the fact that Holtzmann very, very rarely conforms to expectation.


End file.
